Is it time to ban the Holy Bible?

Holy Bible

In July, the Republic Missouri school district voted to ban two books from the school district libraries and from the classrooms. The two books were “Twenty Boy Summer” by Sarah Ockler and “Slaughterhouse Five” by Kurt Vonnegut and they were banned for language, sex, and violence. I think if that is the reasoning then one needs to ask if it time to ban the Holy Bible as well. The Bible has some real nasty bits that I wouldn’t want any children to read.

The Bible has a lot of sex in it:


“And Cain knew his wife.” That’s nice, but where the hell did she come from? The Bible doesn’t mention any of Cain’s sisters. Well, maybe he married his mom. In any case, Cain and the mysterious Mrs. Cain have a son (another blue cigar!). His name is Enoch and he builds a city (population 3). 4:17

“And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son.” Way to go Adam! 4:25

“The sons of God came in unto the daughters of men.”
“The sons of God came in unto the daughters of men” producing “the mighty men of old, men of renown.” 6:2, 4

“Noah … drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.”
The “just and righteous” Noah (6:9, 7:1) plants a vineyard, gets drunk, and lies around naked in his tent. His son, Ham, happens to see his father in this condition. When Noah sobers up and hears “what his young son had done unto him” (what did he do besides look at him?), he curses not Ham, who “saw the nakedness of his father,” but Ham’s son, Canaan. “A servant of servants shall he [Canaan] be unto his brethren.” 9:20-25

Sex in the Bible

Violence? Yep.


God gives detailed instructions for performing ritualistic animal sacrifices. such bloody rituals must be important to God, judging from the number of times that he repeats their instructions. Indeed the entire first nine chapters of Leviticus can be summarized as follows: Get an animal, kill it, sprinkle the blood around, cut the dead animal into pieces, and burn it for a “sweet savor unto the Lord.” Chapters 1 – 9

“Kill the bullock before the LORD … bring the blood, and sprinkle the blood round about upon the altar.” 1:5

“Flay the burnt offering; cut it into pieces.” 1:6

Lay … the head, and the fat … on the fire which is upon the altar: But his inwards and his legs … burn all on the altar, to be a burnt sacrifice … a sweet savour unto the LORD.” 1:8-9

“Kill … before the Lord and … sprinkle blood round about.” 1:11

Cruelty and Violence in the Bible

And don’t get me started on the language:


They went a whoring after other gods.” 2:17

“Gideon made an ephod … and all Israel went thither a whoring after it.” 8:27

“As soon as Gideon was dead … the children of Israel … went a whoring after Baalim.” 8:33

1 Samuel

God smites the people of Ashdod with hemorrhoids “in their secret parts.” 5:6-12

After striking the Philistines with hemorrhoids “in their secret parts,” he demands that they send him five golden hemorrhoids as a “trespass offering.” 6:4-5, 11, 17

“If I leave … any that pisseth against the wall.”
David vows to will kill Nabal and all his men (or as he put it, “any that pisseth against the wall”.) 25:22

“Except thou hadst hasted and come to meet me, surely there had not been left unto Nabal by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall.”
If Abigail hadn’t come and paid him off, David would have killed Nabal and any of his people “that pisseth against the wall”. 25:34

2 Samuel

Amasa is viciously slaughtered by Joab, who “shed out his bowels to the ground … And Amasa wallowed in blood in the midst of the highway.” 20:10, 12


These are just a FEW of the examples. I would not want my child reading or being taught any of that garbage.

And for those who complain that I took those verses out of context or haven’t considered the whole of the book, well the Republic Missouri school district didn’t consider the whole value of the books they banned. They based their decision on specific passages out of context.

Censorship IS a slippery slope.


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One Comment

  1. jwitness
    October 11, 2011

    If you read the Bible you would know where Cain's came from.

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